How?
Video He Guitar Pink Floyd –archive
Tattoo He Phone Pills –attenuate
Photo She Mirror Voices –fade away
Wish?
Rose He Candles Breakfast kiss –frame
Wine He Passion Midsummer indulgence –preserve
Sculpture She Wings Twilight ephemerality –save
You?
You He Face Man –contemplate
He? You? Ghost Others –observe
Amelia She Reflection Path –embrace
Here?
Possibility Instant Expectation Dream — …
_____Adriana Citlali
XXIV-X-MMXIV
Meeting the Bar ~ I’ve Got a Little List | dVerse.
October 23, 2014 at 11:50 pm
fascinating…what an interesting structure you came up with for this…
ther eis a hint of a story but so much left up to the reader to read into this…
very cool…
October 23, 2014 at 11:58 pm
Thanks, Brian. I am glad to read that my list experiment works –somehow… 🙂
October 24, 2014 at 1:53 am
I like the formatting of the list words ~ It looks like a word puzzle, filed with possibilities ~
October 24, 2014 at 4:13 am
What a wonder to try to fill the gaps.. An experiment that works for me… Good for Amalia – I hope it plays out well.
October 24, 2014 at 6:49 am
This is different, and very very interesting.
October 24, 2014 at 7:29 am
That’s definitely a twist on the list-poem I’ve not come across before. As Brian says, it hints at an underlying story – maybe several stories – but leaves a lot of room for the reader to fill in the details.
I think you should keep experimenting with this; it has great potential.
October 24, 2014 at 2:51 pm
Thanks for the feedback, Tony. This structure is what felt right when I thought of writing a poem with a list –with the personal constraint of not repeating the structure I used in the previous dVerse list poem exercise.
October 24, 2014 at 12:51 pm
I agree…starting with this list of word that reference a whole other story..good compilation of associations here.
October 24, 2014 at 2:04 pm
how i wish – how i wish you were here… smiles… i will have an earworm for the rest of the day – smiles
very cool list
October 24, 2014 at 2:15 pm
That’s the song!
Big smiles!
October 24, 2014 at 2:44 pm
A piece of the puzzle has been solved! “Wish you were here” is the connection with He and Pink Floyd. Is he in the video or playing this song in the guitar? Or is he an observer?
This opens more questions: Is he the same as the second he? Is you he? Is she Amelia?
I have a theory but it doesn’t matter. Your poem makes me think and imagine scenarios.
October 24, 2014 at 2:53 pm
Thanks! I like that people are able to see some connections and fill in their own story. I have mine, but as you say it is not relevant. The poem has to speak for itself and the reader has to provide the missing pieces.
October 24, 2014 at 3:39 pm
a new form can start from here…it has great possibilities….comments above have helped me to explore….
October 24, 2014 at 6:13 pm
Groovy piece. The form was lovely.
October 25, 2014 at 2:30 am
poems are expectations and dreams
hurricane and jordan
October 25, 2014 at 5:36 pm
Interesting form you use here – like discrete pieces but you weave them together as a whole as well, Nice effect that one.